The Self Improvement Thread

I've tried writing in the past but found it very hard to get anywhere. I think I have some interesting enough (if possibly derivative) ideas for settings, worlds, overarching concepts and key moments, but totally fail at inhabiting characters.

Even if I have a clear idea of what the character is like I just find they end up being a bit dull when trying to convey them onto paper.

I should give it another bash for fun I suppose.

@wuntyate

Cheers

I actually had an idea for a narrative that has a very small number of characters, so that will take away the issue of trying to make them seen different to each other

In fact, rewriting and editing is as much fun as writing in the first place. I do it on a much smaller scale with my lyrics. I end up writing the songs out about 10 - 15 times, making slight changes each time. Changing a line here, a word there, til it's perfect. That's the best thing about anything creative. It's not finished until you say it is.

Heh! Scrivener is good. I won’t mention Ulysses…oop, just did. (Similar sort of thing, I think just for Apple, also good.)

I use Apple Pages for most things, Google Docs and Office 365 if the client requires it.

Good luck all!

I feel like I have the skills to do this but I'm not sure about finding the work. What's it like to get into? I've seen lots of adverts for courses about that but they always seem a bit scammy.

Thanks! Lots of things to get started on there.

Get that violin out!

I got through Dry January without any slip ups. Wooo! What’s more, I didn’t even celebrate with the traditional four pints on Feb 1st. I had one beer and it was beautiful.

I had a blood test taken yesterday - primarily to monitor my thyroid -which should also give me some idea of how much difference a month off booze makes to liver and cholesterol etc. I get results back in about a week so it should be interesting.

Firstly I don't think you should feel bad for having a drink on the last day. That's still basically a month's break and one day won't make a difference overall.

And yes, I know what you mean. Every time I make an effort to stop drinking I always hope it's going to be a silver bullet that fixes everything. The sun will shine a little brighter, I'll be enthusiastic and productive at work, I'll lose loads of weight and look like I'm 25 again - it'll turn out all the irritations and drawbacks I encounter were directly because of alcohol and I won't miss it at all.

But of course that's not the case. It actually makes little noticeable difference and you have to go through all the discomfort of the sleepless nights and long, boring evenings. And when you do drink again you get wicked hangovers (I had two whiskeys last night before bed - cracking headache this morning). 

So I guess the way forward for me is moderation? 

Yeah, good points, you're both right regarding moderation.

I think I've broke the cycle as I haven't drank again since Monday and having almost a month off is the longest I've gone in years so it's a good start. It would be good to get some sleep though, I guess I need to be a bit more patient and look at other ways to fix that.

Thanks, you're right about the "drink-sleep", it's not really real, but it was better than zero sleep (like you say I guess I've screwed my body up that bad I need longer to adjust).

I am going to take the rest of Feb off & probably aim for Easter after that as my attempt at moderation Friday & Saturday didn't work at all. I honestly thought I'd automatically drink less after a break as I assumed my tolerance would've been "reset" but it had no effect.

I have a feeling 6 months is probably about right to feel "better" (or maybe more?), I'm not sure I can go that long which in itself suggests I should do.

Anyway, perhaps I should start an AA thread rather than shit this one up!

It took me a couple of years before the pull of alcohol was gone (though its still there if I think about it). By 6 months I was mostly clear of the desire to drink, but Christmas was a struggle (it seemed so boring). It takes a while for your body to adjust to not having a pleasure enhancing drug going through it to make "events" that much "better". As a consequence, at first, life can seem a bit gray and dull. It takes a while for the receptors in your brain to readjust to lower levels of seretonin and the new normal. I'm not sure the brain ever fully recovers as once an alcoholic always and alcoholic seems to be the case (I am not sure this is indeed the case, just it seems to be in my limited experience).

I think once your body has shaken off most of the addiction, you can start working on coping mechanisms for whatever it was that got you into the drink in the first place (in my case it was anxiety). I'm very much a work in progress after 6 years off alcohol, but I'm at least improving rather than getting worse. I look old these days, but I'd dread to think what I would look like if I was still drinking. My view is that I was drinking alcohol for 30 years, so can't expect all the bad it did to be undone in a hurry. My brain has spent longer immersed in the stuff than it has without.

As for moderation, I once quit for 18 months and thoguht "yeah I got this" and I started moderating. I was back to where I used to be (if not worse) within 6 months. It was only when I realised that I could never drink again that I was able to quit properly without any lingering regret. I figured I'd drunk for half my life and had realised that my life wasn't all that great with the stuff, so I should try life without it. I would say that without a doubt I prefer life without alcohol. I have far more money, I no longer have hangovers, I can drive whenever I want, I am working on my problems (not drowning them). It helps that I'm married to someone who doesn't drink any more either. Quitting with someone who did drink heavily was the end of that relationship.

Its not all sugar and rainbows when you quit. I had intense cravings initially and when those went, life seemed very grey and I felt very exposed / naked. Meeting people without that liquid buffer was hard and I go out much less now than I did and I have less "friends" (aka randoms I could get drunk with and talk about stuff that a sober me would find mind numbing). My anxiety seemed worse and I noticed other things because I no longer hid in drink and had to face them. I would however rather be facing things and screwing up than not. At least I am learning and I am learning to accept "me".

Oh and I went into a cafe this weekend and really enjoyed it. Who knew that could be possible?

Thanks, I think I'll resurrect that one.



The 30 year thing has just made me realise it's roughly the same for me as I'm struggling to recall any length of time with a break, which is pretty bad when you think about it.

It's good to read about your experiences. 6 years off alcohol is impressive and it sounds like you've been through a lot to get there. Even the original 18 months is good work, I doubt many can do that, myself included. Well done!