H-alphaFox
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Post by H-alphaFox on Feb 2, 2022 22:16:50 GMT
The worst poo wipe poll I have ever seen. And I have seen a few. Sitting or standing? Really? 3 foot away and hope for glory, it is fun though. Front to back or back to front is valid. Folding or scrunching too. Better poo polls available. Do you fire ping pong balls as well? Might need to ask the standers first. I wasn't aware that was a thing. I'm a solid sit and plop. Even if it aint always a plop. |
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H-alphaFox
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Post by H-alphaFox on Feb 2, 2022 22:23:55 GMT
Taking your shirt off is perfectly normal.
of course.
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jono62
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Post by jono62 on Feb 2, 2022 22:27:37 GMT
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Frog
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Post by Frog on Feb 2, 2022 22:52:16 GMT
Also when you get old, all of you standers will need to sit down and wipe and then you will be left with regret at all the time you have wasted.
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Post by Dougs on Feb 2, 2022 22:54:23 GMT
And energy. Sitting on the throne is one of life's great pleasures. Why give up some of that time?
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Post by Reviewer on Feb 2, 2022 22:56:21 GMT
What option is covered by getting someone else to do it for me?
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Post by Nanocrystal on Feb 2, 2022 22:57:51 GMT
I'm a solid sit and plop. Even if it aint always a plop. Pro tip: putting a bit of TP in the water before you commence virtually eliminates the plopping noise, sparing your spouse/family/co-workers the unpleasantness of hearing it. As an added bonus, it also prevents splash back. |
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Post by Dougs on Feb 2, 2022 23:10:32 GMT
But then you won't be blessed by Neptune's Kiss
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 2, 2022 23:13:03 GMT
When you veet down there and get blessed with a Neptune's kiss its...unsettling.
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Post by MolarAm🔵 on Feb 3, 2022 0:39:49 GMT
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Lizard
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Post by Lizard on Feb 3, 2022 5:16:15 GMT
This is utter madness, honestly.
First wipes sitting down, then I rise up for standing wipes. I also start upwards, and then finish with a careful (you don't want shitty balls) downwards wipe to catch anything that has resisted an upwards motion. It's the only way to be sure.
If you going to do something, do it properly.
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Post by Nanocrystal on Feb 3, 2022 5:18:58 GMT
Finish with a rapid up-and-down polish, surely?
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Lizard
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Post by Lizard on Feb 3, 2022 5:25:10 GMT
Finish with a rapid up-and-down polish, surely? One-way glide at a time. The scrubbing I hear in public/work toilets makes me worry for the state of the collective human anus. |
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Lizard
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Post by Lizard on Feb 3, 2022 5:27:19 GMT
Anyway, the important question is what did Mowgli do after the chair incident? That should be our guide.
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Post by LegendaryApe on Feb 3, 2022 14:03:52 GMT
How has such an important topic been
relegated to the second page of the forum?!
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mikeck
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Post by mikeck on Feb 3, 2022 18:06:45 GMT
It still astounds me that there are grown adults here who remove clothing when pooing and then proceed to stand and wipe!?!?
How can you wipe standing up!?! Surely your butt cheeks are too close together and clenched to get a thorough wipe going. Madness!!
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mikeck
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Post by mikeck on Feb 3, 2022 18:09:54 GMT
Also, am I the only one who sometimes treats themselves to using one of the kids wet toilet wipes. That's a luxury wipe for when I'm needing a pick me up.
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Post by Sarfrin on Feb 3, 2022 18:48:50 GMT
Finish with a rapid up-and-down polish, surely? Floss with a length of rough hemp rope for ultimate particulate removal. |
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mrpon
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Post by mrpon on Feb 3, 2022 18:53:50 GMT
A quick peep thru the legs to check for tagnuts. Whilst sitting, natch.
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Immaterial
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Post by Immaterial on Feb 3, 2022 21:46:20 GMT
Also when you get old, all of you standers will need to sit down and wipe and then you will be left with regret at all the time you have wasted. When you get old, the real problem is trying to not dunk your dangly old man balls when sitting to shit. |
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Post by Nanocrystal on Feb 3, 2022 21:53:58 GMT
Also when you get old, all of you standers will need to sit down and wipe and then you will be left with regret at all the time you have wasted. When you get old, the real problem is trying to not dunk your dangly old man balls when sitting to shit. When you live in a hot climate, that is actually a nice way to keep cool. |
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Frog
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Post by Frog on Feb 3, 2022 22:07:22 GMT
Would be more worried about shitting on them as they dangle there lifelessly.
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Immaterial
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Post by Immaterial on Feb 3, 2022 22:30:09 GMT
You need to work your cremaster harder.
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Frog
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Post by Frog on Feb 4, 2022 7:12:05 GMT
Gravity conquers all.
Also nice to see the standing freaks exposed in this thread.
LOOK AT THE NUMBERS YOU FREAKS!
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cubby
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Post by cubby on Feb 4, 2022 7:23:27 GMT
Those numbers are shocking.
If you're standing up you may as well have a wander round the bathroom while you're at it. Brush your teeth.
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Post by Nanocrystal on Feb 4, 2022 7:23:39 GMT
Showed this poll to the misses and turns out she's a stander. You think you know someone!
Too scared to ask which direction she favours...
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cubby
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Post by cubby on Feb 4, 2022 7:24:18 GMT
No woman would wipe forwards, Shirley?
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Post by Nanocrystal on Feb 4, 2022 7:25:23 GMT
I'm going to cling to that assumption.
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Frog
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Post by Frog on Feb 4, 2022 7:31:05 GMT
I assume the reason for not asking her direction is that you have left her now so it doesn't matter.
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Post by Fake_Blood on Feb 4, 2022 8:28:36 GMT
My theory about standers is that that’s how their mommy wiped their arse and they just kept doing it that way.
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