addyb
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Post by addyb on Aug 2, 2024 18:32:03 GMT
Really struggling at the moment. I've not been great health wise and my girls just continue to get worse with their Autism. Local authority have stopped using our care providers without finding a replacement first, so we now have zero support and there needs to be two of us to handle our youngest.
Earlier I just thought I might go to the train station later and just throw myself on the tracks.
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Frog
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Post by Frog on Aug 2, 2024 18:39:50 GMT
It's fucking hard having one kid with special needs mate let alone 2. The dips to your own mental health are brutal, I have been exactly where you feel many times. It will pass mate and there will be some light again. Then it will come back but each time you get a bit better at dealing with it.
At my lowest point I actually went to throw myself off a bridge and the only reason I didn't on that day was that someone else was there with the police holding them to stop them jumping. Not sure if I have shared that with anyone before and I'm doing it with you now because I know where you are at but I know it can and will pass.
If you can speak to someone like Andys man club, talking can help. I'm always there if you need me too mate.
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Post by rawshark on Aug 2, 2024 18:43:50 GMT
Really struggling at the moment. I've not been great health wise and my girls just continue to get worse with their Autism. Local authority have stopped using our care providers without finding a replacement first, so we now have zero support and there needs to be two of us to handle our youngest. Earlier I just thought I might go to the train station later and just throw myself on the tracks. I’m glad you didn’t. Sorry things sounds really shit. Please call someone if it gets that bleak again. There might not be any immediate solutions but there has to be a way to get through it. |
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Post by Danno on Aug 2, 2024 21:33:14 GMT
Really struggling at the moment. I've not been great health wise and my girls just continue to get worse with their Autism. Local authority have stopped using our care providers without finding a replacement first, so we now have zero support and there needs to be two of us to handle our youngest. Earlier I just thought I might go to the train station later and just throw myself on the tracks. You *need* to speak to your GP about you and I mean as soon as humanly possible (if you haven't already). Those thoughts are not something to just dismiss as heat of the moment, because there could be a heat of the moment. I'm worried addy |
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addyb
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Post by addyb on Aug 3, 2024 10:35:06 GMT
Thanks all. My lack of self worth is an all time low at the moment. I will check out that club Frog. I've been in and out of the docs recently with some health stuff, but don't want to hit them with the mental health stuff as they weren't much use last time.
Not sure what I'm doing at the moment. Head is a mess.
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Post by Jambowayoh on Aug 3, 2024 11:06:40 GMT
We're all here for you mate.
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quadfather
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Post by quadfather on Aug 3, 2024 11:30:59 GMT
Yes keep talking to us if it helps and I'd definitely follow Frog's advice too about talking to someone.
Take each day at a time and do some breathing exercises. I know that sounds a bit lame, but myself and my other sister advise our other sister about these exercises when she has extreme panic attacks and they do work mate.
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wunty
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Post by wunty on Aug 3, 2024 12:19:30 GMT
Thanks all. My lack of self worth is an all time low at the moment. I will check out that club Frog. I've been in and out of the docs recently with some health stuff, but don't want to hit them with the mental health stuff as they weren't much use last time. Not sure what I'm doing at the moment. Head is a mess. Can’t add much more to what has been said already but we’re always here, even if it’s just to read / listen. You’ve always got us to offload to if you need to man. Can’t imagine how hard it is for you just now. |
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Post by drhcnip on Aug 3, 2024 12:23:19 GMT
Really struggling at the moment. I've not been great health wise and my girls just continue to get worse with their Autism. Local authority have stopped using our care providers without finding a replacement first, so we now have zero support and there needs to be two of us to handle our youngest. Earlier I just thought I might go to the train station later and just throw myself on the tracks. Mate, remember what I said…here if you need me, you know where I am |
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Post by LegendaryApe on Aug 3, 2024 20:09:01 GMT
Really struggling at the moment. I've not been great health wise and my girls just continue to get worse with their Autism. Local authority have stopped using our care providers without finding a replacement first, so we now have zero support and there needs to be two of us to handle our youngest. Earlier I just thought I might go to the train station later and just throw myself on the tracks. If there's anything at all I can do please let me know. I'm always here to chat |
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addyb
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Post by addyb on Aug 3, 2024 22:32:24 GMT
I was speaking to my wife earlier and told her about that Andy's man club and have already emailed them just confirming where the Preston group is. They do sessions every Monday so will look to go the week after next.
Missus asked me if I was suicidal and had to lie as she's already on edge and don't want to put that on her. Truth be told I was close to going out Thursday night and just throwing myself in front of a train, and it's scared me that my mind has just flipped like that. I was also thinking about leaving a note and what that would contain.
I can't think straight at all currently and struggle to even converse with people. Like I'm malfunctioning or something.
This may go into a incoherent mess so I really appreciate the messages and support. I feel so ashamed and selfish that I'm wanting to just exit like that.
Like I said my opinion of myself is just at an all time low and just don't feel like I'm of any relevance anymore.
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Post by Danno on Aug 3, 2024 22:52:02 GMT
Addy this is literally crisis. If I knew you irl I would be referring you to crisis services (while informing you). Please get help now, you can't keep this inside anymore
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Post by drhcnip on Aug 3, 2024 23:10:38 GMT
Yup, exactly, couldn’t agree more having been there. As I said to Addy earlier today, I’ve been there with the pills and whisky, knife and bath ready. It’s an impossible and terrifying place to be. I’ve suggested various routes to him.
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Post by Danno on Aug 3, 2024 23:22:08 GMT
addyb please mate, you can't do this on your own anymore. At least call Samaritans if you feel you need to (116 123)
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quadfather
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Post by quadfather on Aug 4, 2024 8:46:17 GMT
Yes, addy, give them a ring mate, please.
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Post by Jambowayoh on Aug 4, 2024 13:05:48 GMT
I'll pile on with that. Please speak to someone.
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addyb
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Post by addyb on Aug 6, 2024 8:26:03 GMT
Went to the docs earlier, got signed off for a month, i also contacted AMC and will initially join an online session next Monday and if all goes well I'll start attending in person when I can.
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Post by Dougs on Aug 6, 2024 8:53:13 GMT
Glad you are getting some help.
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quadfather
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Post by quadfather on Aug 6, 2024 8:53:15 GMT
Went to the docs earlier, got signed off for a month, i also contacted AMC and will initially join an online session next Monday and if all goes well I'll start attending in person when I can. Glad to hear it. How are you feeling now? Let us know how the amc stuff goes, if you're up for sharing etc |
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wunty
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Post by wunty on Aug 6, 2024 8:53:16 GMT
addyb Excellent man. A solid, assertive step in the right direction.
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addyb
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Post by addyb on Aug 6, 2024 9:16:33 GMT
Went to the docs earlier, got signed off for a month, i also contacted AMC and will initially join an online session next Monday and if all goes well I'll start attending in person when I can. Glad to hear it. How are you feeling now? Let us know how the amc stuff goes, if you're up for sharing etc Tired and still a low mood but feel better that I'm at least attempting to sort it. Thanks for all the support on here. Means a lot. |
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Post by drhcnip on Aug 6, 2024 9:22:07 GMT
Great news, mate. First, and sometimes hardest, step in the right direction. Take care of yourself and you know where I am.
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Post by damagedinc on Aug 6, 2024 9:55:05 GMT
Massive step! It's not easy and so glad you did it. Take this time to spend with your loved ones and look after yourself.
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wunty
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Post by wunty on Aug 6, 2024 10:06:16 GMT
addyb Acknowledging you're not feeling right is one step, taking the first moves to help yourself is another. That's two steps already. Two steps further forward than you were. You've got this. Keep us updated as little or as often as you feel comfortable, but we're here.
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addyb
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Post by addyb on Aug 12, 2024 17:24:35 GMT
Got my first session tonight with AMC (online) will feedback later. Past week hasn't been too bad. Got signed off work and my manager has been great. Still stressed with the girls, but if I keep myself busy my mind doesn't wander.
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Post by Jambowayoh on Aug 12, 2024 17:43:32 GMT
Glad to hear Addy. We're with you.
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Post by LegendaryApe on Aug 12, 2024 17:55:24 GMT
Great stuff, Addy.
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quadfather
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Post by quadfather on Aug 12, 2024 19:27:17 GMT
Yeah better news. Let us know how the amc goes later
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addyb
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Post by addyb on Aug 12, 2024 21:15:09 GMT
Session went well. I definitely found it easier to talk with strangers and other lads that have shit going on. Will see what happens.
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quadfather
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Post by quadfather on Aug 12, 2024 21:42:42 GMT
Session went well. I definitely found it easier to talk with strangers and other lads that have shit going on. Will see what happens. That's great news, glad to hear it |
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