Rate the last film with your terrible opinions

simple I agree with you on Poor Things. It’s a good film but not a great one

I loved the bit where he sets fire to an office block with some petrol from a can and then it EXPLODES.

I enjoyed The Beekeeper, it’s total crap but still good fun throughout

Some of the lines where he’s explaining to the call centre people that what they are doing is naughty are so badly written that they become funny

Solid recommendation

Spoiler

I was hoping for more from this, it just felt a bit flat and didn't really go anywhere. Ian Wright was great though  

I thought that was absolutely fascinating, for clarification they bought Jodorowsky's art book for his vision of Dune. That they had a collective but no collective intelligence to parse what they had actually bought was truly chef's kiss. It really led credence to the idea that a lot of NFT adjacent people aren't these smart wunderkinds.

I always thought it was strange that the sequels looked so much like the sort of straight to dvd stuff that half of the cast would be doing outside of the franchise. Like surely there was an audience and money to be made from Stallone and Arnie teaming up somewhere.

Get Statham's name right. It's LEE CHRISTMAS.

I remember absolutely cracking up at one of his movies where he was a London gangster called something like Terry Leather.

I do actually remember that. How could anyone forget Sly’s wet, shimmering butt cheeks pumping away in that shower.

DNDHAT

It was very okay. If it came out in the early 2000s, I’d be regarded as poorly as the Jeremy Irons/Marlon Wayans film. Because it was released last year, its reputation was elevated because it doesn’t feature superheroes.

Not absolutely terrible, but paper thin plot and characters, terrible visual effects (but still not as bad as The Flash). Extremely forgettable. I’m glad I finally saw it, so I can get it out of the back of my head that I should watch it at some point.

X-Men (2000)

So I'm trying to rewatch all* the Fox X-Men movies before Deadpool, just in case there's some random seventeen-frame joke I miss because I forgot all the different actors who played Kitty Pryde. 

Anyway, the film definitely holds up in most respects. Compared to modern superhero films (or even superhero-adjacent action movies like, say, Dungeons & Dragons) this is a fairly sedate affair, as we're slowly immersed in the world of mutants. The first half's creeping tension and drip-feed world-building actually reminded me of that other 90s X-property, The X-Files. Again, however, compared to modern films its symbolism and allegory is incredibly heavy-handed and on the nose; which, I guess, reflects not just the need to introduce this world to a mainstream audience for the first time but also the timbre of the comics it was adapting. Anyway, the performances are largely good (Sabertooth and Toad notwithstanding) but, really, apart from Jackman, McKellen, and Paquin, hardly anyone is given anything to do or really much in the way of character at all (even my beloved P-Stewz, essentially being Professor Exposition until he's taken out of action for the third act). And speaking of action, it is rather flat and sedate. In fact, the slow pace, stagebound nature, and mediocre action choreography does make it look like the pilot of a network superhero drama; if the main actors were five or ten years younger it could have been part of the Arrowverse. That feels like a bit of a dig, and it isn't; whilst I definitely feel it is showing its age, it's still a compelling, mostly exciting film, with some great performances and a nice sense of a "real" world of mutants. It still retains that sense of setting the stage for more complex and engaging adventures. Let's see if I think X2 is as good as it used to be, I guess.

Three Xs out of five.

*I doubt I'll actually watch all of them; I think I saw Apocalypse and Dark Phoenix as soon as they came on Disney+, which is recent enough to know they're both pretty shit.

One of the things I am looking forward to is most of these films I've only seen once. So I hated Last Stand, but that was when it came out; I mean, in retrospect, it's probably better than most DCEU films!

The almost funny thing is they’ve done the same film twice, and despite all the advances in special effects and all the benefits that hindsight brings, Dark Phoenix is still categorically the worse film.