Rate the last film with your terrible opinions

No I watched the Beekeeper

I mean...Amy never really seemed like a lesbian.

Road House (the 1989 one)

Thought I'd watch it again before the new one comes out.

The famous bits remain great, but overall it's... kind of boring? I like the build-up to Dalton being this ultimate bouncer, but once the action kicks off it feels like a bit of a letdown to me. You could probably cut 20 minutes and it would be a better movie imo.

Anyway, it's not bad or anything. I just had a distinct memory as a kid of this forbidden movie on the VHS rental shelves, and the reality of it is slightly disappointing.

7.2/10

Certainly a lot of the recent blockbusters have been long. There’s those, Mission Impossible, Top Gun and more.

No issue with length but at 3 hours an intermission would be nice.

The irony of Scorsese getting grumpy that some cinemas out an intermission in his 3 1/2 hours film as well. There’s no way an 80 year old + can last that long without a break.

Contact - Probably my favourite of the A tier Zemeckis movie. I just think its neat and I appreciate the themes more and more as I get older, so that's nice.

8/10

Dune (2021) - 4K UHD, Samsung 65" S90C, 5.1.2, Sunday evening - 90/100

Wonderfully made sci-fi for adults, with top tier sound and visual design, great acting and despite it's long runtime great pacing

Dune 2 (2023) - 70mm, PictureHouse Central, middle seats middle row, yesterday - 80/100

Longer runtime but with poorer pacing make this a slight disappointment relative to the first. I found the final act rushed, certain character arcs didn't feel earned and it lacked a bit of explanation (I don't need things spelling out, but it felt there was essential story missing). It still looked and sounded incredible, and I thought the cast were generally excellent. Perhaps a second viewing will up the score, or maybe the 3rd instalment (assuming it gets the go ahead) will help explain some of the motivations.

Tombstone was only a few years after roadhouse and he'd already morphed into the wizened old cowboy we know and love by then.

Another factor to consider is that being in the streaming era, we’re also in the marathon era. Folks tend to binge a whole season of a show in one go, so while films are certainly getting longer, audiences are becoming more accustomed to being sat down in one place, eyes focused on the screen.

As someone who has trouble watching more than one of two episodes of a show at a time, I really miss 90-120 minute films.

Charlie Sheen does that to all of us.

It was in the sitting room, with my family present. I quickly covered my shame with a nearby cushion.

The cushion was green.

And now look at me. On top of the world

Errrrrr

Poor Things - Disney+ - Where do I start? The music is eerie as fuck, which works well for the disturbing atmosphere. Some of the camera shots are brilliant, others are jarring. They feel out of place, as if they are mimicking CCTV cameras. I am not sure if it is intentional or not, but it doesn’t work for me. It doesn’t add to the atmosphere, but dragged me out of it. The cast are stellar, though Mark Ruffalo should have made up which mind he was going for. But the story, it is fucking wrong. Woman finds sexual liberation and her own place by being exploited by misogyny and rising from property to her own woman; feels uncomfortable. I would have to say, that was my take, maybe I am being too aware. It is an uncomfortable film, and I think that was the intent. But is it any good? In my opinion no.

4/10

Aqua Man 2 - One of those we stopped showing it, but we’re chancing some of you might want to see it again cinema showings - Where do I start? The music features so great action movie tracks, born to be free and spirit in the sky. They kind of work, once you realise that you cannot use music to set a scene or film where Jason Mamoa is in. There is a fuck tonne of CGI, SFX and I usually like this stuff. Some of it looks cool, but makes no sense. The rest, I see where some of you are coming from. It generally looks Alien, and not the good, first film Alien. The cast are wasted, there are plenty of good cast members, not including Jason. But the story? What the fuck? Apparently all that climate change was down to a megalomaniac and an orphan conspiring to do what exactly? And fuck the Atlanteans, after ousting his brother from power, Aquaman needs him. Only we find out Atlantean justice is to lock up prisoners in a ritual torture dungeon in the desert. Then 5hey team up, some pointless shit, then they attack the prison guards of megalomaniac, I think, at this point I wanted a pee, and wasn’t waiting until the end. It was utter fucking dog shit. I really wanted the DCU to turn out a great film, but all we got was Wonder Woman as a good film. 0/10

Poor Things - I think this is just a sex comedy? Like I don’t think it’s particularly profound and maybe isn’t trying to be, it’s just a Taste The Difference ‘Confessions Of A Hideous Science Experiment’.

And as that, it worked for me. It’s pretty funny, it’s absolutely gorgeous, the costumes are amazing and the acting is tremendous (other than Willem Dafoes wandering German/Scottish accent).

I can see how it would get on people’s tits if you weren’t in the mood for it. It could feel self indulgently odd, like a Tim Burton movie with bush, but I thought it was pretty cool.

8/10