Lizard
Junior Member
I love ploughmans
Posts: 4,352
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Post by Lizard on Nov 1, 2021 10:56:04 GMT
Next we're going to steak Psychotext's house.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2021 10:57:23 GMT
What have I missed, my ears are burning. Nothing, unless you're Challenge Hannukah as well. Don't think so. But who the fuck knows really.
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Post by LegendaryApe on Nov 1, 2021 12:12:43 GMT
I'm having explosive, loud shits in the toilet at work.
I work in a library.
People may be able to hear me.
We all share the same toilet.
The noise is bad. The smell?
The smell is worse.
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Post by Danno on Nov 1, 2021 12:15:43 GMT
I'm having explosive, loud shits in the toilet at work. I work in a library. People may be able to hear me. We all share the same toilet. The noise is bad. The smell? The smell is worse. There's a whole thread for these events my dude
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Post by LegendaryApe on Nov 1, 2021 12:19:05 GMT
It sounds like a whale getting a hand job down an echoey cave.
Help me Danno
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Post by Jambowayoh on Nov 1, 2021 12:22:07 GMT
I'm having explosive, loud shits in the toilet at work. I work in a library. People may be able to hear me. We all share the same toilet. The noise is bad. The smell? The smell is worse. Always remember to flush straight away as soon as evacuation has occurred.
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Post by Danno on Nov 1, 2021 12:30:53 GMT
It sounds like a whale getting a hand job down an echoey cave. Help me Danno Front it out. Open the door and make unwavering eye contact with all that enter as you void yourself.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2021 12:31:23 GMT
Cannot underestimate the importance of Jambo's tip. Also, another little pro tip: Throw a few sheets of toilet paper in before you start for a little extra muffling, not just the arse coughing but also the initial splashdown.
Also don't be afraid to flush halfway through, so long as you're comfortable with the hover stance.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2021 12:57:08 GMT
iirc, C_H said on EG that he was Aunt Alison, but was joking, because they are clearly different people. Lizard said he was smuggo, but I think that was a joke too, I don't get a smuggo vibe atall. As to where C_H is, out on his bike hopefully and telling people he likes them I am actually Challenge Hannukah. Well that's cleared that up at least. I hope the neighbours are under control
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2021 12:59:51 GMT
Erm not what I wanted to read while I'm having lunch. I avoid that other thread for a reason.
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Post by LegendaryApe on Nov 1, 2021 12:59:55 GMT
Thank you all for your help, your tips were implemented and I think I have avoided shaming myself.
In a workplace that has a number of derogatory nicknames for customers I have avoided being called Loudshit for the rest of my career. So far.
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Post by Aunt Alison on Nov 1, 2021 13:02:58 GMT
I wish gremmi still did titles
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2021 13:10:35 GMT
Erm not what I wanted to read while I'm having lunch. I avoid that other thread for a reason. To be fair at least you're not one of LA's co-workers. They're not just reading it. They're living it.
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Post by Jambowayoh on Nov 1, 2021 13:12:31 GMT
LIVING IT L I V I N G
I T
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2021 13:14:21 GMT
LegendaryApeOh I'm quite sure it wouldn't just be limited to Loudshit. There's probably loads of names they could call you. Peter Stormarse, Shits McGhee, Thunderpants, Shite Night, etc
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2021 13:14:56 GMT
You've fucked that up Jambo. I think if you look at it you'll see how.
Embarrassing.
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Post by Aunt Alison on Nov 1, 2021 13:15:09 GMT
LegendaryGape
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Post by Danno on Nov 1, 2021 13:16:01 GMT
Shits Mcgee got an unreasonably loud laugh. Scared Ms. Danno
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Post by Aunt Alison on Nov 1, 2021 13:17:39 GMT
LegendaryGrapes after a certain age
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nexus6
Junior Member
Posts: 2,430
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Post by nexus6 on Nov 1, 2021 13:18:37 GMT
Brad Shit
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cubby
Full Member
doesn't get subtext
Posts: 6,038
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Post by cubby on Nov 1, 2021 13:21:32 GMT
I'm having explosive, loud shits in the toilet at work. I work in a library. People may be able to hear me. We all share the same toilet. The noise is bad. The smell? The smell is worse.
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Post by LegendaryApe on Nov 1, 2021 13:48:35 GMT
LegendaryApeOh I'm quite sure it wouldn't just be limited to Loudshit. There's probably loads of names they could call you. Peter Stormarse, Shits McGhee, Thunderpants, Shite Night, etc All reasonable names I would have accepted
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Post by LegendaryApe on Nov 1, 2021 13:49:55 GMT
I appreciate all the replies. Now for lunch: an original curry Pot Noodle.
The Pot Noodle and have digestive issues are completely unrelated I assure you.
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Post by Jambowayoh on Nov 1, 2021 13:51:33 GMT
You've fucked that up Jambo. I think if you look at it you'll see how. Embarrassing. Fuck. I guess I should... QUIT U I T
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Post by khanivor on Nov 1, 2021 15:41:44 GMT
Use the jailhouse courtesy flush; pull the handle as your drop the load
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Post by Danno on Nov 1, 2021 15:52:50 GMT
Use the jailhouse courtesy flush; pull the handle as your drop the load Does that not make your whole undercarriage soaking wet?
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Vortex
Full Member
Harvey Weinstein's Tattered Penis
is apparently a mangina.
Posts: 5,183
Member is Online
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Post by Vortex on Nov 1, 2021 17:00:47 GMT
Saves on buying a bidet tho.
Just hope no floating debris stick to your bits.
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Post by freddiemercurystwin on Nov 1, 2021 18:25:47 GMT
I hate my job ATM and have just returned to it from a week off, just about signed up to a massive mortgage that ends when I'm 69, meh! I could blame Mrs Mercury for all of this, kids and shit but then if it weren't for Mrs Mercury my liver would be twice the size and my lungs would still be choked up with soot so there's that too.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2021 18:40:33 GMT
I'm in a similar position. Mortgage ends about the same age. My job no longer exists and I've got to agree another role which looks like it will be junior and something I don't want to do. That's after working my ass off the last few months. I am suffering badly from stress, my mental health sucks and my marriage is being affected. I'm not sure my wife wants to be with me at the moment.
I need another job, but last time I went for one, the company pulled it the month before and I'm concerned that my mental health is no longer good enough to deal with the pressure of finding and then dealing with a new place.
I'm going to ring a counselor. Drs are no use as they'd either give me pills to make me a zombie or put me off with stress and if they did either, I might as well tell my company I can't cope (despite their mental health policy). I've seen them do it to another person recently.
Anyway, best I keep on putting one foot in front of the other and I'll see how things go. I'm trying to keep away from the rest of the family at the moment in case I do or say something that will make things worse. Still, there are people on this forum who are far worse off, so I should stfu.
Tldr please ignore this. I'm a bit close to the edge (hopefully migraine, but if my wife's opinion of me is correct, then it's probably that I'm just a miserable, bad tempered so and so). Just needed to get it out as otherwise I'll cry.
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Post by Jambowayoh on Nov 1, 2021 18:42:42 GMT
Nothing wrong with a good old cry. Far too many people bottle these things up and it comes it out in all the wrong ways. Don't be your own worst enemy.
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