Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 14, 2021 13:06:01 GMT
She was pretty upset, I'm a bad person. She was way to good for me.
Anyway, I've messaged 3 people to no response...business as usual. God I fucking hate this shit.
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Post by retro74 on Sept 14, 2021 13:15:38 GMT
Probably better to do it now before she’s even more invested into the relationship though
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 14, 2021 13:20:04 GMT
Too right. Feel like I've killed something fairly good though. But I promised myself I'd follow my gut feelings,and not be a people pleaser as usual, so that's the way it is.
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Post by Dougs on Sept 14, 2021 13:21:27 GMT
If it ain't there, it ain't there. No point faking it, regardless of how nice etc they are.
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 14, 2021 13:21:44 GMT
Sorry, this is all a bit maudlin. You need some tasty dirt to laugh at, give me time.
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Post by supersoupy on Sept 14, 2021 14:08:47 GMT
Know the feeling. Am there myself, although a bit further into it and yet know what needs to be done. It is ultimately having the strength to call something over nodding and letting things go on and on.
Props to you for getting there, it's not easy.
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 14, 2021 16:57:27 GMT
I'm crap at the the breakup thing, I've approached in various ways over the past year, from trying to tail things off gradually to the full brake approach, neither works very well. From the other side I prefer it straight up. I really don't like hurting people, but anyway, it's a huge relief.
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 14, 2021 16:59:57 GMT
On a functional aspect I hate the way Match operates, the way it constantly pushes you to cold call people, firing messages into the void is just painful. Tinder is so much more direct and simple.
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Post by 😎 on Sept 14, 2021 17:10:28 GMT
OkCupid was the only one I managed any success with. Four or so years later it all seemed to have worked out.
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Post by Jambowayoh on Sept 14, 2021 17:15:07 GMT
On a functional aspect I hate the way Match operates, the way it constantly pushes you to cold call people, firing messages into the void is just painful. Tinder is so much more direct and simple. Well it's definitely more simple with the amount of profiles that say no guys under 6ft and other bullshit requirements they like to add.
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Lukus
Junior Member
Posts: 2,415
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Post by Lukus on Sept 14, 2021 17:56:47 GMT
I'm a firm believer in breaking up the same way I remove sticky plasters. I'll gear myself up to do it one quick motion, but get stuck half way through then spend far too long gradually unpicking the mess I've made, trying not to cry. Then once it's all done I'll have a biiiig old wank.
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Post by Lionheart on Sept 14, 2021 19:39:28 GMT
I'm crap at the the breakup thing, I've approached in various ways over the past year, from trying to tail things off gradually to the full brake approach, neither works very well. From the other side I prefer it straight up. I really don't like hurting people, but anyway, it's a huge relief. It’s always difficult and it really sucks to hurt someone who is really nice. But if you’re not feeling it, it’s better to do that rather than them get more invested and even more hurt down the line, and after they’ve wasted more time as well. As long as you’re honest and don’t do something shitty like cheat on them rather than just telling them straight up that’s all you can do, and really you’re helping them because they deserve someone who is fully into them. Thing is, everyone who dates has to accept that you can get hurt, that’s just the way it is. Fair play to you for doing the right thing, having experienced both sides I actually think it is harder to be the person doing the breaking up because you are in control and can doubt your decision, whereas if they do it then you have no choice. Don’t doubt yourself though, you know you’ve done it for good reason. Onwards and upwards (despite how shit online dating can be sometimes!).
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Tomo
Junior Member
Posts: 2,504
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Post by Tomo on Sept 14, 2021 20:17:01 GMT
Sorry, this is all a bit maudlin. You need some tasty dirt to laugh at, give me time. Clock is ticking, and we're hungry. STARVING. Good luck, FHUTA, etc.
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Post by stuz359 on Sept 14, 2021 21:03:10 GMT
So, anyone know how to get rid of a dead body? Asking for a friend.
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 14, 2021 22:47:09 GMT
Sorry, this is all a bit maudlin. You need some tasty dirt to laugh at, give me time. Clock is ticking, and we're hungry. STARVING. Good luck, FHUTA, etc. I'll see what I can do
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 17, 2021 10:22:10 GMT
Hate it when conversations just stop. Why can't people end things properly, rather than just not replying.
Shit this is uneventful, really small dating pool up here.
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Post by Jambowayoh on Sept 17, 2021 10:33:51 GMT
You mean when they ghost you after you've actually had some interaction? I understand why it happens but yeah I do find it pretty rude, just say you're not interested
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Post by Triarii on Sept 17, 2021 10:43:24 GMT
Hate it when conversations just stop. Why can't people end things properly, rather than just not replying. Shit this is uneventful, really small dating pool up here. Yeah, it seems to happen all the time on Tinder. I've had better luck on Bumble, although I've had a few matches who fail to start the conversation and get auto unmatched. Saw this profile a few days ago...
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Post by Dougs on Sept 17, 2021 11:52:34 GMT
Living off grid, but plugged into an online dating app. Good grief
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Post by quadfather on Sept 17, 2021 12:00:20 GMT
Tinder init. Cesspool.
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 17, 2021 13:29:13 GMT
Seems the case across the board up here.
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Post by Nitrous on Sept 17, 2021 22:46:49 GMT
OkCupid was the only one I managed any success with. Four or so years later it all seemed to have worked out. Same here but seven years and married for two. The Mrs was in her late 20's at the time and before she deleted her profile showed me the middle age men who viewed her. I used POF for awhile before that and it was awful. I remember seeing a profile who was openly cheating on her partner while he was at work and the one girl I managed to arrange a date with liked biting my lip while scratching my back. Wolverine claws! Couldn't wait to leave the pub and delete my account. Edit: This thread needs Sharz* he had a way with the ladies providing they lived within a certain distance. *Not sure if I remembered the name correctly.
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Post by godwhacker on Sept 18, 2021 9:58:05 GMT
OkCupid was the only one I managed any success with. Four or so years later it all seemed to have worked out. I had some good success with Guardian Soulmates back in the day. After splitting up with my ex I moved over to Bumble and Tinder; had more success with Bumble, but met my GF of 2.5 years now on Tinder. From the dates I had, some women prefer the relative safety and freedom from unsolicited dick pics they get on Bumble, and some women hate that they have to make the first move, so prefer Tinder. Living in London there's always lots of people on both.
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Post by alcachofa on Sept 18, 2021 10:09:23 GMT
Recently joined this OLD phenomenom and it's doing my head in already. I hate microtransactions in gaming, this is even worse.
Early impressions (though they're all from the same parent company, of course)... Didn't get on with Tinder, cesspool indeed. OkCupid seems almost designed to NOT let you connect with someone decent in your region. Did have some moderate succes on Hinge. Quite a few attractive women on there and at least you can respond more directly and start a conversation (before they start ghosting you, that is).
Mainly, there just seems to hang an air of staleness around these apps. But maybe that's just how it works online - or me being late to the modern dating party.
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 18, 2021 11:11:22 GMT
OkCupid is stupidly expensive. Maybe that's where all the hot rich ladies hang out and I'm missing the fun!
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mrharvest
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Registered 18 years ago Posts 5,718
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Post by mrharvest on Sept 18, 2021 11:56:16 GMT
I had pretty good luck with dating apps. Met my current partner on one (Hinge possibly).
I dated an Italian woman for a year (Tinder, I think), she was great but wanted to move in Italy and there's not much work there for foreigners.
Then had a brief relationship with an NI woman (Bumble maybe?), still friends with her.
I never paid for any of the apps. I think it comes down to not being a dick and having an open mind.
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Goban
New Member
Posts: 289
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Post by Goban on Sept 18, 2021 12:17:22 GMT
I think the main problem I have is my location, very little activity, and I seem to attract women that look the same age as my mum 😆
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Post by godwhacker on Sept 18, 2021 12:36:31 GMT
I think the main problem I have is my location, very little activity, and I seem to attract women that look the same age as my mum 😆 I think online dating is usually a pretty fair representation of who's in your area, so you may want to consider moving
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mrharvest
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Registered 18 years ago Posts 5,718
Posts: 373
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Post by mrharvest on Sept 18, 2021 12:53:23 GMT
Yeah, location matters for sure. You live in a smaller town goban?
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Post by quadfather on Sept 18, 2021 13:57:55 GMT
I'm in that shitty position where I am genuinely in love with a woman who is genuinely in love with me, but is married with 2 kids in a really toxic controlling relationship.
Nothing can be done, and we have to watch each others heads being constantly done in.
Fucking hell fate, you really know how to party, don't you.
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