Cost of living crisis/kWh Measuring Contest

We have a continuity planning meeting this afternoon for a general strike scenario. I have let it be known that I am not a scab, so Im quite looking forward to it.

I propose we create an Excel workers union...globally.

The only requirement is that you use Excel for atleast 70% of your work.

We could bring down the entire economy  World.

Yep, looks like Unite is my best fit apparently.

www.tuc.org.uk/join-a-union

That’s pretty cool.

Yeah, it actually is. We are pretty well protected, certainly in comparison to most non-union places. Like nobody can ask us to work over our contracted hours and if they do, its immediately paid overtime or TOIL. No wage theft allowed.

If you will forgive my indulgence, I work with a complete cunt that insists on making every Excel file a shared document when he starts his shift, roughly an hour or less before my shift ends. It can then take me two minutes or more to save it after a couple of entries. I have told him, I can save it and let him do the work, but no. He is resolute he knows what is best. Yet he cannot get the driver’s packs out of the relevant trays without assistance. I am not saying it is bad, but a few weeks ago, whilst drunk, I told my Mam, that I feel like ending it all. An exaggeration, but I fucking hate everything about my current employment situation.

I get two days off out of seven. I want a product to reflect my circumstances in its title.

It depends on what cock of a company you work for, but I used to work for Wincanton, and as they are cunts, I couldn’t give a shit about naming them. I had three occasions where they stopped money from my pay, with no notification. Each time I went through the route of asking why this was, and being ignored continuously. My last email would always I would escalate this further, and the union gave me their support. Each time it was resolved in my favour. Because they they were cunts that thought bullying worked.

To give you an example of when they deducted pay from me. I had all the symptoms of COVID, and had to go into the mandatory isolation. I got this after coming into contact with someone who had tested positive for COVID. I don’t know why my spell checker capilitises that. They argued that I couldn’t say whom I had been in contact with. Despite the fact that a manager had come into work, took me into an office, and explained that he tested positive and had came in to pick up the fuel card so he could get home. I mean, type one diabetic isn’t the highest risk category, but it is up there. They on,y relented when I pointed out that it was me that notified the NHS that I had been in contact with someone that’s tested positive, and developed symptoms, that I took the time off. Cunts, I was shitting myself the whole time that I was going to die, and they stopped my wages as if I was a puss taking twat.

Fuck anyone that opposes unions.

I've not been that close to the news, but it appears Chancellor Nadhim Zahawi's earth shattering suggestion is that people should look to cut down for much energy they used.

Fucking cunt, he'll be one of my first targets once I snap*

(*Unlikely as I'm lazy but I'll damn well imagine unspeakable things happening to him)

I want the heating in Westminster set to 18C. All winter.

10 and 11 downing street the same. 

Well Boris did want to let the bodies pile up in the streets. He may soon get his wish.

My monthly rate has gone up 109% since Jan 21.

Yey I go up 87% and hit £6k per annum

Glorious....