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Post by LegendaryApe on Jun 16, 2023 18:22:56 GMT
You don't have to use it for water. Feed it through your neighbours letter box and feed your bodily waste through it.
It's organic, smells terrible, and they'll hate you for it, but at least you'll get use out of the hose
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Post by LegendaryApe on Jun 16, 2023 18:55:11 GMT
What do you call a plumbing business started by two former prostitutes? Ho's Pipes
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KD
Junior Member
RIP EG
Posts: 1,263
Member is Online
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Post by KD on Jun 16, 2023 20:51:03 GMT
I heard a shit joke and I been shaking my head for 10 minutes, now my neck hurts.
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Post by Dougs on Jun 16, 2023 22:27:58 GMT
Come now, Mr Ape's joke was pretty bad, but not that bad, surely...
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Post by JuniorFE on Jun 17, 2023 0:57:07 GMT
If we want bad jokes, I've got one... What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? What hole the cucumber goes into Actually, didn't we have bad jokes and good jokes threads in the old place? Did they not make it over?
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Post by RumMonkey on Jun 17, 2023 1:00:40 GMT
They made it over, it's every thread now.
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Post by dfunked on Jun 17, 2023 7:24:18 GMT
What about the good jokes, though?
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Post by Bill in the rain on Jun 17, 2023 10:05:36 GMT
I just bought a new hose pipe, just in time for a hose pipe ban. The shoutbox has the perfect reddit group for you, but apparently it's still private. Your timing sucks.
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Post by freddiemercurystwin on Jun 17, 2023 12:27:31 GMT
You know, for as shit as the UK and society seem to have gotten recently, it's nice to know that random punters will still give someone's car a push to the pub. I don't think it's quite as bad as people want to make believe, sure there's plenty to gripe about this place but still a lot of good out there.
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Post by deekyfun on Jun 17, 2023 14:57:32 GMT
I fancied a bit of WW2 action (who doesn't!) and was scrolling through my Steam Library. Call of Duty WW2 Singleplayer was there at an easy 17gb. So I click on it to download and pop away for a second thinking I'll be sunning myself on Omaha beach in no time. When I check on it, that 17gb has somehow turned into 90ish gbs. What the hell, guys?
Oh, yeah, and a joke. I guess I should have put this under second world (war) problems.
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Vortex
Junior Member
Harvey Weinstein's Tattered Penis
is apparently a mangina.
Posts: 4,666
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Post by Vortex on Jun 17, 2023 16:29:20 GMT
I think that one maybe forces a war zone download too.
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Post by LegendaryApe on Jun 17, 2023 16:29:25 GMT
I agree with Deekys passionate assertion that you can't post in this thread without a joke
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Post by Danno on Jun 17, 2023 21:02:02 GMT
I've already learnt (to a pretty solid degree albeit without an actual degree; I write/edit witness statements for the High Court) the bastard language that is English, why do I have to learn another, and why is it so difficult >.<
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cubby
Junior Member
doesn't get subtext
Posts: 4,931
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Post by cubby on Jun 17, 2023 21:10:39 GMT
Why can't everyone else learn English eh? Those bastards.
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Post by Danno on Jun 17, 2023 21:21:00 GMT
3 centuries spent conquering everywhere possible and there are still other languages. We should exhume Drake, all of the East India Company execs and anyone else we can rope into this and spit on them
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Ulythium
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Lily-livered
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Post by Ulythium on Jun 17, 2023 21:24:48 GMT
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Post by rhaegyr on Jun 20, 2023 14:47:27 GMT
Clutch went on the car yesterday, right before a roundabout in rush hour. There goes the OLED budget Turns out it was only the master cylinder that went, not the clutch. Only £148 quid - definitely deserves to stay in this thread. OLED TV is back in the game!
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askew
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Post by askew on Jun 20, 2023 15:24:14 GMT
There you go!
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mrpon
Junior Member
Posts: 3,070
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Post by mrpon on Jun 20, 2023 15:26:06 GMT
\o/
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2023 16:16:24 GMT
What TV you considering, rhaegyr?
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jono62
Full Member
Posts: 5,056
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Post by jono62 on Jun 20, 2023 16:28:37 GMT
The one he was going for, he is suddenly 148 quid short.
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Post by rhaegyr on Jun 21, 2023 7:36:05 GMT
Clutch went on the car yesterday, right before a roundabout in rush hour. There goes the OLED budget Turns out it was only the master cylinder that went, not the clutch. Only £148 quid - definitely deserves to stay in this thread. OLED TV is back in the game! Picked the car up yesterday from my aunt's boyfriend. "Make sure you get that crack in the windscreen sorted before your MOT" "What crack?" "Er, there's a big crack in your windscreen" "That wasn't there before" "Er...." Typical! Can't kick off as it's my aunt's other half and he's buying my girlfriend's car tomorrow off her. Hopefully I can get it done on the insurance for cheap and it won't affect my no claims bonus. Prick.
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Post by rhaegyr on Jun 21, 2023 7:37:00 GMT
What TV you considering, rhaegyr? OLED C2 - the awkward 48" as that's the only one that will fit in my living room. Been waiting for that £799 sweet spot for a while now. Should be a massive upgrade on my Panasonic 42" 720p plasma - when I get the bloody thing anyway!
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mrpon
Junior Member
Posts: 3,070
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Post by mrpon on Jul 19, 2023 9:32:46 GMT
My girlfriend puts an X after every text message. I feel obliged to reciprocate.
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cubby
Junior Member
doesn't get subtext
Posts: 4,931
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Post by cubby on Jul 19, 2023 11:06:52 GMT
humblebrag
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Post by deekyfun on Jul 19, 2023 11:12:53 GMT
My girlfriend puts an X after every text message. I feel obliged to reciprocate. Don't just reciprocate, escalate!
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mrpon
Junior Member
Posts: 3,070
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Post by mrpon on Jul 19, 2023 11:18:07 GMT
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Vortex
Junior Member
Harvey Weinstein's Tattered Penis
is apparently a mangina.
Posts: 4,666
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Post by Vortex on Jul 19, 2023 11:36:12 GMT
My girlfriend puts an X after every text message. I feel obliged to reciprocate. Don't just reciprocate, escalate! X aubergine donut
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Vortex
Junior Member
Harvey Weinstein's Tattered Penis
is apparently a mangina.
Posts: 4,666
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Post by Vortex on Jul 19, 2023 11:37:22 GMT
/Awaits mrpon's I don't have a gf anymore post if he tries that.
Or maybe...
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Post by deekyfun on Jul 19, 2023 11:52:32 GMT
Don't just reciprocate, escalate! X aubergine donut I was just originally thinking an extra X, but no, definitely emoji is the way to go. Ones that make you think.
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